Leslie & The LY’s
Interview with Leslie Hall: The Most Magical Web Celeb of All
Words: Aubrey Bramble

Appearing:
February 20, 2008
Jack Rabbits, Jacksonville

February 21, 2008
BackBooth, Orlando

February 22, 2008
Crowbar, Ybor City

Leslie Hall is not your average Internet celebrity.

You probably know her as the Gem Sweater Lady, but she is far, far more than just a wearer of fancy wool. She is a fierce unicorn woman in a sea of ordinary brown mares. She is a gem sweater preservationist and promoter by day, and a larger-than-life hip hopper by night. She is like one of those "free gift with purchase" deals from your neighborhood department store's cosmetics counter: just what you didn't know you needed, full of hidden treasures, and extra flashy. I bet when she's old and grey, she'll be drawing her eyebrows in, crooked and bold on purpose.

Fortunately for the glitter-loving masses of West Central Florida, Leslie (along with bandmates, the LY's) is bringing her spirited, high rollin' revue to Crowbar in Ybor City on Friday February 22nd. The two days prior, she'll be in Orlando and Jacksonville. For those of you unfamiliar with the stage sorcery of Ms. Hall, this is an event not to be missed.

Leslie's so excited about coming to the TPA, she composed this lovely message:

"Dear Tampa, FL,
I come from the Midwest where we got corn, snow, and good times. I would like to pinch a dash onto your noses and let you watch me jiggle and shake in a gold suit singing love jams from my Dear Diaries. Please show up in something sparkly, or you will be out of place and unwanted. Please come for the entertainment purposes of some shock and awe. We run a tight, very good show. The thing with my show is I've seen some bands play and I get bored. They're not neat and there's no effort involved. They're wearing jeans and a t-shirt. Let me tell you what. I'm running a Las Vegas showgirl show compared to that. It's top quality at reasonable prices, and my merchandise is pretty cool to boot."

In addition to the saucy sentiment above, Leslie had some more pertinent info to share with me about her upcoming tour, what it's like to be Keeper of Thyne Gems, and other, more domestic things, like her massive Spice Girls collection.

REAX: I am so jazzed that you are coming to Tampa. Have you been here before?
Leslie Hall: Oh my gosh! No! I'm thinking fast cars and easy women! This needs to be a joyous experience for everyone. Our first time, their first time..

REAX:  It needs to be gentle, involved, and exciting.
LH: Oh definitely... and press-worthy.

REAX:  Is this your first big US Tour?
LH: Yeah. They've all been minis compared to this. This shit is crazy! For two months we will be away from our pets, our TVs... we are not complainers though. We're really excited. There are highs and lows; we're gonna experience them all!

REAX:  You've got your own web dynasty going over at lesliehall.com. Can you talk to me about your upcoming musical effort, Midwest Diva?
LH: This next album that I'm putting out is full of a lot of Midwest references to ladies like myself: large and in-charge, hungry for lovin' clubgoers. It's just getting back to the Craft Era days.

REAX:  What about your in-development public access show, "Holla Back Ames?"
LH: I wanted to do something about being an Internet celebrity and living in your hometown. And nobody giving a crap, but on the Internet you're like Posh Spice. It's like, "I need some respect!" It's about hometown pride. I wanna be my Ames, Iowa Idol and represent the people.

REAX:  How do you come up with the ideas for your music videos, and more importantly, how do you create the final product?
LH: You can always tell the ones that I made, and then the ones that someone else made. The ones I direct are always crappy, cheap, and peppy because I let my dancing and my outfits do the talking. When other people make them, they're like, "Let's showcase the visuals." I don't know; big difference. "Willow Don't Cry" - I think that's one of my favorite videos. It's nice when professionals come in. I do think they want to get famous and make money from it, but it's impossible. Nobody's getting rich. As soon as I have a director contact me that wants to get paid, it's like, "Sorry." Britney can pay them, but I can't.

REAX:  How do you come up with outfits for your stage performances?
LH: My mom still is making them for me. She has some spare time. I buy her books to inspire her, because she always wants to make bellbottoms and 70s clothes, 'cause that's her "era." I'm like, "Oh, gross!" I try to steer her more towards sci-fi, wrestling... we're always clashing heads. We meet in the middle. She's very good at details, which I am not. We've learned over the years that gold is my signature color. She used to make purple, and red... but she's stopped all that bullshit and now she just makes gold. You never see Mickey Mouse in anything other than red pants. It doesn't mean everything I own is gold. I actually enjoy the color green in my day wear, but night wear - just wrap me in gold and expensive minerals!

REAX:  Flashy and sassy.
LH: Love it!

REAX:  Now back to the gem sweaters. Is that something you began collecting on your own?
LH: Yeah. I started collecting them in high school. I'm such a thrift whore. I've got all kinds of tupperware; my Spice Girls collection is so impressive. This is just another collection that I'm into. I was like, "Oh my gosh! These need to be photographed." This was like eight years ago, when fan sites were popping up all over the internet and I was like, "Why not make a website based on my love of these garments?"

REAX:  They photograph well because they're sparkly.
LH: Oh, definitely. And that is the image. People see the icon, they see the potential, and they crave it. They see it in my eyes, the sweater, my thighs, the pants, the wrinkle of my nose, and those oval glasses. I tell you what, I couldn't have planned it better. I was like, "Oh my gosh, I'm famous! What do you do?" So I wrote a hip hop album. You need a product. The internet is all about views. Why not have it about money in my pants?

REAX:  Is being the Gem Sweater Lady a full-time job for you?
LH: Definitely. I'm always getting them in the mail. I'm always helping people. I feel like a dinosaur preserver of the bones because I really am the authority, like Sports Authority.

REAX:  Do you present the sweaters as-is, or do you restore them?
LH: We have a restoration ring in the Mobile Museum of Gem Sweaters to educate, but I do leave them in their natural setting. Ones with mold or moths are quarantined; we don't want those in the population. I do not create sweaters either. I am simply just displaying them. I don't want to be Martha Stewart. I want to be the showcaser. I do  know the techniques because I did study it. It's like I went to "sweaterology" school and earned my PhD, but I don't practice it. I preach.

REAX:  Where do you get the inspiration to come up with your music?
LH: I don't actually listen to hip hop, and I don't listen to popular music. I listen to Country and my old favorites, Spice Girls and Britney. So I think I am inventing a new sound, coming from a background that doesn't make sense and trying to create words that go with it. I'm not trying to write comedy songs, but they are smart. I don't talk about my crotch or my tiddlywinks. I want to do a mall tour for kids and they'll probably do research on me. And if they go back in history and they find an album where I sang about stuffing things in my hoo-hoo, I would lose that opportunity and that's something I don't want to do.

REAX:  Speaking of fans, I love your look-alikes!
LH: People always tell me how they dress up like me and I'm like, "Well, send me the pictures, bitch!" Dang! That is the ultimate honor. That is so flattering, so amazing. It's a win-win. I get teary-eyed; they get teary-eyed from the joy.

REAX:  Would you ever play somebody's Sweet Sixteen?
LH: Oh my God, I played one yesterday! I got a call. This boy's friend - a girl - was turning sixteen and they were having it a pizza parlor in Ames. And I did it for a personal size cheese pizza. It was a surprise. I showed up at the restaurant, dressed to the nines. I had a boom box and a microphone. I sung them "Gem Sweater," picked up my pizza and left, and I swear, I left the girl balling because she was blown away.

REAX:  Have you ever played a party with pony rides, or a clown?
LH: I'm usually the big pony, the high dollar amusement.

REAX:  Well, I will see you on February 22nd for sure!
LH: I can't wait. I'm getting "thunder feeling" about it - the thunder rumbles!

I expect to see each and every one of you at this show. Dressed in your sparkliest wool blend, bijou sweaters, pumped and ready to have the time of your life. Leslie is counting on you!

lesliehall.com
leslieandthelys.com